My name is Anna & I'm 46 years old. I was told by my ear nose
& throat Dr that I had HIV after they had done an MRI of my neck.
The reason for this was because a year ago I had a tumor on my jaw
on the left side that he removed then & I developed a bump on
the other side that was squishy it turned out to be my lymph nodes
had pockets of this virus on them. That's when he ordered a blood
test and I was positive for HIV. The doctor was kind enough to look
up information for me on where to go for help.
A little of my childhood I was sexually abused at age 7 till I got
pregnant. My mom was an alcoholic and would go on binges and we would
have to care for my brother Dan which was a baby at the time. I have
4 brothers, the second oldest was the one that abused me. I began
drinking with my mom or friends at age 11 which led me to pot, acid,
downers and heroine, really anything I could get my hands on. I got
married at sixteen and I was pregnant with a child that I didn't know
if it was my brothers or my soon to be husband. Well when the baby
was born he looked Mexican like his father and not my brother which
angered me because it was going to be my proof of what my brother
was doing to me. When I got married I said I was going to be a good
mother but I really couldn't with all my hurt, anger, and not knowing
how to deal with life without drugs or alcohol so of course I was
just like my mom; an alcoholic plus I had a big heroine habit with
it.
Anyway, I had these classes and had to do something. First I told
my husband in the doctor's office which he took well, I thought, till
we got home he told me he was going to the store and never came back.
I lost everything where I was living in my truck and I had no job
so I was in bad shape. My daughter accepted it. She has helped me
so much with being there for me. My son took it bad he was using drugs
at the time and was in and out of jail. My mom and dad accepted it
with no problem at all. Me and my kids moved in with them.
I got in touch with the DuPage Co. Health Dept. They told me to go
to Catholic Charities and also ask the pharmacy if they would be able
to help me with my meds because they were just too expensive for me
to pay for. I got help and got my medication that consisted of 6 pills
in the morning, 3 in the afternoon, and 6 at night, but now the meds
are better and I only take 5 for the whole day. I developed a kidney
problem and had 14 surgeries. I thought it was because of my HIV.
But it wasn't so then I was blaming myself. The doctor assured me
that I didn't do anything. I got an infection in the incision from
the last surgery. It was more then likely, the Dr. said, it's because
of my HIV which left me with an open incision and a nurse had to come
to the house and clean it and pack it. Then I found out that I had
hepatitis C and had a biopsy of my liver and it was at a 1-2 which
they have 4 stages then I changed Drs and started going to a lot of
groups at Regional Care in Joliet and began a treatment for my Hep
C which did not work for me. I became anemic and had to stop the treatment.
I had another biopsy and found that I was now at a 3.
I'll tell you I'm scared, but with support from the HIV groups and
eating well I think I'll be ok. I'm very tired all the time and I
got fat stuff on the back of my neck. It bothers me but I'm doing
the best I can. I have been in the emergency room a lot for a herniated
disc. And have had Drs say how did you get HIV? Or Hep C? I now say
which I really believe no one is better then anyone else. I tell them
it's not important how I got it, its important that we need to find
a cure. Then they shut up. My best friend, or whom I thought, when
I told her at her house that I had HIV she told me to take my disease
fat butt out of her house and never come back. That hurt me a lot
so now I say if I meet someone that think they could be a good friend
I say before we become friends or start really talking that I have
HIV. Some people it doesn't bother at all some don't talk to me anymore
and some ask a lot of questions which is great to me.
I've had problems with nurses at the hospital which shocks me that
they are not educated enough on this disease. It's really sad that
the health people don't know. It's really a tough fight but so is
life. I just have two things to really fight for; myself and everyone
else living with this disease.
The hepatitis is really the one that is starting to affect me the
most at this time, my feet are starting to turn purple and deep breaths
hurt. I sleep a lot; I only can do a little bit of things at a time.
I run out of energy quickly. The good things are that I met a lot
of great people and I also lost a lot of these great people to this
disease. I'm so much closer to my family and the people I meet mean
a lot to me today because they and I are here today but who knows
about tomorrow. But you know as well as I do that's true with all
of life. I'm still here and I plan to be for a really long time.
A lot of times I look back and I can see so much love a lot of people
have for the people who are infected with this to mention a few Pat
Lev-my PA-C.N.A Mary Prestige, Open Door Clinic itself and Bill and
Marilyn and Regional Care in Joliet are just some of the many wonderful
people I have met and so many great things they have for us to do
that I can honestly say that if I had it all to do again I just wouldn't
change a thing. I have learned and met a lot of people and I've been
more educated than I ever would have been. All the dark demons are
gone. And I'm still here and will be for a long time.
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